


The Awakening of Zack Fair

by breatherepeat



Category: Phandom/The Fantastic Foursome (YouTube RPF)
Genre: Domestic, M/M, Stress, Temporary Amnesia, Travel
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-10-31
Updated: 2016-12-17
Packaged: 2018-08-28 02:33:15
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 4,276
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8427868
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/breatherepeat/pseuds/breatherepeat
Summary: Phil has an urge for sugar and ends up in Manchester with a new haircut and a lot of questions. Dan, meanwhile, wonders where Phil went and why.





	1. Chapter 1

Rummaging through the cabinets in the kitchen, Phil huffed upon finding another empty bag of sweets. It was late in the evening, with Dan talking to the internet during a YouNow and Phil attempting to finish an edit on a video that just seemed to never quit. He had already ordered the pizza and added a desert from the take away place; however, he stated in the order to deliver the food after Dan was finished with his chat. Looking to the kitchen clock, Phil debated whether he could wait another 30 minutes for sugar.

After weighing the pros and cons in his head for a good five minutes, Phil grabbed a warmer jumper, grabbed some paper money, and texted Dan 'Brb. SUGAR!!!'

Phil smiled at the reply as he reached the last step and quickly walked toward the outside door. 'be back before PIZZA'

Texting back 'left wallet to pay for pizza in case they show early,' Phil went to tuck his phone into his front pocket and tripped into the door. Silently cursing his genetics, Phil let the door slam shut behind him and continued on his mission to acquire sugar before he lost his mind. 

As Phil continued on his way to get a quick sugar fix, Dan replied again to pick him up something sweet as well. Phil's phone buzzed against the inside of the door, left behind after never quite entering his pocket as he ran into the door.

****

"What else should we talk about?" Dan fixed his hair with one finger while attempting to gain a direction in the chat. The chat was going fast; however, he saw Phil's name pop up at least a dozen times. "Where is Phil? Get Phil!"

Dan smirked at the camera. "You know, when you demand to see Phil, it reinforces my self-concept that I'm not good enough for you." Allowing the chat to scroll some more, Dan saw some people talking about the time. "How is it 10:15? Seriously, it was just half past nine a minute ago. Where is my dinner? Someone ordered pizza and it was to be delivered by now. And where is Philly-boy? Stay tuned for the next episode to find out. Okay everyone, be kind and remember: Your attitude determines the course of your life."

Clicking off the screen, Dan looked at the messages on his phone and saw that Phil hadn't read his last message to get him something sweet too.

"Phil!" Dan shouted as he stretched his back. He had been hunched over a bit and had stayed in one spot for too long. "Phillip, where is my dinner and my sugar?!" Dan teased as he walked down the hallway to the lounge. Not finding his husband, Dan looked toward the kitchen and then down the hallway to their rooms.

"Phil?" Dan asked again softly. Telling himself not to panic and that Phil was probably just chatting up the pizza delivery person, Dan took a quick sweep of the apartment before he headed down the stairs. Reaching the bottom of the stairs, he saw the brightly colored case to Phil's iPhone and shook his head. He loved his husband dearly, yet he had a few quirks and being extremely forgetful with his gadgets was one of them. Unlocking the phone, Dan saw his last message and a voicemail from the pizza place stating they were running behind and the pizza would be free.

Hearing a knock on the door, Dan startled before remembering the pizza. After recovering, Dan accepted the pizza and desert and had the delivery kid wait while he ran to get a tip.

After absentmindedly over tipping for the food, Dan went back up the stairs and saw that it was now 10:43 and there was still no Phil.

Clumsy, in his own world, Phil out in the wilderness without his wallet or his mobile. Dan told himself that he would give it another fifteen minutes before he started officially panicking and he was proud of himself for making it five minutes before he rang Phil's mother.

Talking to Phil's mother calmed his mind. She reminded him that Phil had made it this far in life without major injury and he was a grown adult capable of making it to the shops and back.

Dan ended the call and went into the lounge to wait for Phil. Turning on the TV, Dan found a random show that neither of them normally watched and forced himself to not look at the time every few seconds.

****

"Where to?" The attendant behind the counter asked as he kept his eyes on the newspaper he was reading. After not getting a response, the attendant looked up and asked again, "Where to?"

"Oh, I'm not sure." Reaching into his pockets, he sighed when he was reminded he did not have his wallet. "I need to make it back to Manchester. How far can I go with £55.20?"

"You are a bit short. If you are willing to wait a few hours, I can probably get you to Statford by morning." The attendant was used to people attempting to ran away with only the money in their pocket. "What should I put the ticket under?"

"Zack Fair. I need to get back to my wife there. She is pregnant and I could be a father anytime now." Zack smiled bright. "I wish I could show you a picture, but I was robbed and someone took my wallet and phone on the tube. I'm not meant to be in the city any longer."

"First time father?" The attendant looked over the schedule again. "I remember my first. The little bugger was early and I missed the whole thing. Wife still gives me grief about it to this day and Maddie is almost off to university. Look, I'll give you a discounted rate and we can get you home by seven tomorrow."

"Oh, thank you, sir. Thank you!" Zack's smile increased. Finally, something was going right for him. He was in London on business and it did not go in his favor. His business was attempting to expand to the London market and his forgot his notes to the meeting to sell the idea. On the way back he was mugged after reading his wife was in labor and he figured life couldn't get much worse. "You have restored by faith in humanity."

Brushing the hair out of his eyes, he decided the first order of business upon arriving in Manchester was to get a hair cut. He wanted to look his best for his unborn child and hair in his eyes was not the impression of the world he wanted to give his child. Taking out his bag of chocolate, Zack watched the people move about the station as he bit into another piece of deliciousness. 

 


	2. A Moment of Truth

"Good morning, sir. Name please."

"Zack Fair. I have a slight problem, you see. I have no money, but I'm in desperate need of a haircut." Zack smiled as he brushed the hair off his forehead again. "I had the most horrid time in London and I just returned the morning. I was mugged. Before they took my mobile, I received message that my wife was in the beginning stages of labor. I must cut my hair before the baby is born. I know it seems silly, but my wife hates..."

"Oh my stars!" The female stylist behind the desk turned from updating her client list on the computer and saw a YouTuber she had been following for the last few years. Remembering the name he gave, she gave him a confused face and then stepped closer. Same face and build, it must be. "You are AmazingPhil, I mean, Phil Lester, right? Are you recording a bit? Where is Dan?"

The stylist stood on her toes as she looked behind him and saw there was no one in the waiting area. 

"I'm sorry, you must be mistaken. My name is Zack Fair." Zack said without hesitation; however, there was something about the names she used that sounded familiar. Feeling a tingle go up his back, the feeling was gone as quick as it appeared. Turning toward the receptionist, he asked, "Is there someway I could barter for a haircut or could I leave you my address and you can send a bill? I'm good for the money, I just have to get to hospital soon before I miss the birth." 

"Sally, it seems like my person is not showing. I'll cut his hair! Since I will be out money either way, no charge." Beth, the questioning stylist from before, stepped forward and gestured to her station. She felt like a fool and decided to cover it up with the offer of a free cut and a smile. "Wow, you could be his twin. Same style of dress and everything."

"Oh, you are most kind." Zack followed the stylist to her station and sat down. Moving his hair through his fingers, Zack made eye contact with Beth in the mirror and explained his idea further. "I want the hair off my forehead and styled a bit differently. Maybe with a quiff? Shorter on the sides and flipped up in the front. No trouble though, and I will pay you as soon as I have money."

Gathering her sheers and materials for the cut, Beth shook her head at the resemblance to the man she had just watched this morning before work. She had a few minutes before she had to leave and she was randomly clicking around on YouTube when one of AmazingPhil's videos was recommended for her. It was a quirky story video about an awkward encounter with a stranger. Looking around once more, Beth told herself she was mental if she believed this was the AmazingPhil from YouTube.  

"Ready?" Beth said once she gather herself and turned on professional mode.

***

"How long do I wait until I ring the police?" Dan spoke into his mobile, which was on speakerphone, while he paced around the apartment looking for "clues" as to where Phil might be. He had paced the apartment all night searching for something, unable to sleep with Phil not home. "Are they going to ignore me? Laugh at me? Or worse, ask me questions I'm not emotionally prepared to answer?"

"Take some deep breaths, love." Phil's mother yawned and took a sip of her coffee. She was a bit concerned, but not nearly as concerned as Dan given his devastated tone of voice. "Maybe he went to stay with a friend?"

"He would have told me." Dan stopped his pacing and dropped down on the sofa in the lounge. "I have never been more worried in my life. I'm literally feeling ill. He would have came home once he realized he didn't have his phone. He has been gone overnight. Something's wrong."

"Ring the police." Phil's mother woke up as Dan's voice broke on the last word. "Even if they just say they cannot do anything, just tell them. Maybe go on that Twitter and ask your followers to look for him? They outnumber the police."

"I cannot post this on Twitter. What would I say? 'Phil is lost. Please call with information?' No, that will be a last resort option." Dan laid his phone on his chest and slouched down further into the sofa. "I'll ring the police and...I don't know."

After telling Phil's mother he would update her once he knew more, Dan searched the number for the local police station and took a few deep breaths before pressing the button to call.

"Hello, I need to speak with someone about a missing person."

"Do you have information on a missing person or are you reporting a missing person?"

"Reporting a missing person."

"How long have they been gone?"

"He went to get sugar around half past nine last night and has not returned since. He left his wallet and mobile here."

"Has he done this before? Left without giving word?"

"No, never. He....we...we don't leave without telling the other. Ever."

"Do you suspect he might be in any danger?"

"He is the clumsiest person in the world and has an unnatural ability to attract the most unusual people....He...we...well, we are somewhat known and we have a large following of people that know our names and have very strong emotions about us."

"I'm going to ask some more questions before I transfer you to the missing persons department. What is his name and birth date?"

Dan continued to answer a variety of questions about Phil until he was transferred to another person, who continued to ask the same questions the first person asked. Bringing his hand up to brush his untamed hair, Dan continued to take deeper breaths as he answered the questions again.

The officer on the line said they would need a detailed description of the clothes he was wearing and a recent photo before they were able to put out a bulletin listing him as a missing individual. Since it was early in his disappearance, they were not going to send out officers yet; however, Dan was instructed to ring again tomorrow if he hadn't returned by that time. In the meantime, surrounding areas police departments would be notified and would keep an eye out for his description. The officer, John, also recommended that Dan call around to the surrounding hospitals and ring anyone he might have gotten in contact with since he had been gone. 

While Dan held down the ever increasing feeling of unease, he started going through their list of friends. He wasn't ready to ring hospitals.

*****

Walking into St. Mary's Hospital, Zack searched for signs on where to go. His hair was freshly cut and styled and he was ready to start the next phase of his life: Fatherhood. Finding the listing of services, Zack headed toward the lifts and took a few deep breaths to calm his nerves.

The lift opened and both Zack and an elderly couple entered.

Pressing the button for the right floor, Zack smiled to the elderly couple next to him. "My husband is having a baby. Which floor?"

"What did you say, dear?" The women looked toward her husband and then back to Zack.

"My husband is having our baby. First one. I hope I didn't miss it. Which floor to you need?" Zack looked to the lift number and froze as the red numbers counted up. Something seemed familiar about the sight of the numbers changing. Something about a stage and people screaming. As the lift dinged for his floor, he suddenly remembered everything.

"Holy fuck." Phil stood frozen as the couple quickly made their way around him, the wife clenching onto her husband's arm.

As the doors closed, Phil saw his reflection and everything about coming to Manchester hit him. He had cut his hair and made it into a quiff. Beth, the lady that gave him the new style, had given him a business card so he could send money once he got home. Beth, who kept looking at him out of the corner of her eye and had asked if his name was Phil. Pressing the button for the doors to open, Phil rushed to the nurse's station and asked to use the phone.

Pausing to remember the number, Phil put the landline phone to his ear and only had to wait for two rings before his husband answered. "Dan."

"Phil. What the actual fuck? Where are you? Do you know I rang the police? Are you hurt? Are you dead? Were you attacked? What the fuck?" Dan continued to ramble off questions as Phil listened patiently.

Once Dan ran out of breath, Phil attempted to answer his questions. "I'm in Manchester. I will tell you the whole story as soon as I...I don't know how to get home."

"Why are you in Manchester? And where in Manchester?"

"St. Mary's."

"St. Mary's Hospital?! Phil, what is going on?" Dan continued to put on his shoes in hast as he questioned, hoping he was not injured or seriously ill. 

"I thought I needed to come here and I figured out a way to get here. It is more complicated but I can't over the phone. I'm going to speak with a nurse and wait for you. Please, come get me?"

Pausing from grabbing for his keys, Dan's voice was low and full of concern. "Are you hurt?" 

"No. Just come get me, please."

"Oh course." Dan started to make his way down the stairs and paused again. Going back to get Phil's mobile and his wallet, Dan wished he could keep Phil on the line until he was next to him. "I"m leaving now. Do not go anywhere! I love you." 

"I love you." Phil reluctantly gave the phone back to the nurse. After thanking them, he asked where he could go to speak with someone about amnesia and possible brain issues. The nurse said he would walk him to the proper place. As they walked, Phil wondered if he was truly starting to lose his mind. 


	3. Answers

"What the ever-loving...." Dan rushed into the room and then froze seeing the new haircut on his husband.

Dan was exhausted from the lack of sleep, public transportation, and constant panic he had been experiencing since Phil went missing.

On the train ride over, Dan ran into a small group of subscribers who first apologized and then meekly asked for a picture. Dan's eyes were red and his skin a pale shade of exhausted, but he made the group's day. He was ignoring social media for the time and could only imagine what people were saying about the photo.

Dan thanked the nurse behind him who had shown Dan to the room Phil was currently sat in and waited for the door to close in privacy before tentatively walking towards his husband. Phil was sat on top of an examination table, still in his clothes from yesterday, looking nervously and exhausted himself. Touching Phil's hair, Dan frowned. "Your hair."

"Dan, I'm sorry. I don't know why it happened but it was like something came over me." Phil took Dan's hand away from his hair and pulled him closer. Resting his head against Dan's chest, Phil squeezed him a bit too tight and felt everything rush out of him. "I thought I was someone else and I needed to come to this hospital because my wife was giving birth. I had a name I told people and a whole story about being mugged in London on a business trip. Dan, I took a train here and decided I needed a haircut to meet my newborn baby. I could have gone anywhere and thought I was anyone else. I didn't even know I was doing it until I was in the lift here and the floor dinged. It was a snap and I was back to myself, but I remembered everything I did. Then, I rang you and told a nurse what happened. They want to do some tests to figure out what happened. What if I have a brain tumor? What if I'm going mad?"

"Did they say anything yet?" Dan hugged Phil back just as tight, letting out a sigh of relief knowing that Phil was physically in one piece and did not appear to have any unusual marks on him. Dan had a million different scenarios played out in his head since realizing that Phil was not coming back to their apartment last night. He couldn't really wrap his head around what Phil had done and needed many more answers before he could relax.

"They did a scan of my head and took my blood. I had to answer some questions and complete some paperwork. The nurse said to wait in here and that I could put my clothes back on." Phil pulled Dan to sit next to him on the hospital bed. Scanning his eyes with his own, Phil's face fell. "Oh, what you must have thought when I didn't return." 

"I rang your mum after a while and then texted everyone we know in London. I paced a lot overnight wondering where you were and what happened. I found your mobile by the outside door and figured you couldn't be gone long without a wallet or phone. I mean, unless someone kidnapped you and was chopping you up into little bits." Dan ran his hands up and down Phil's arms and chest, perhaps to reassure himself that Phil was really fine and sat in front of him. "I was planning on what to say on Twitter about your disappearance. I had a couple of drafts saved on my phone. All of them I couldn't finish."

"Did you let them know I was found. Or, okay...or whatever? Our friends and my mum, I mean." Phil brought Dan close again to hug him and pressed his face into his neck. Being close to Dan had always calmed him. Phil couldn't imagine what his mum was thinking with the news he was missing. If it were reversed, he would be in full panic. "I worried so many people."

"I rang your mum and sent a text out to Louise to spread to the rest." Dan let out a long breath as he allowed himself to relax a bit more. He would be content to just sit with his arms around Phil if it weren't for the fact that they were sat in hospital.

Hearing a knock on the door, both startled and then adjusted themselves so they were sat side-by-side. Seeing it was the physician, Phil took Dan's hand in his own and placed their combined hands in his lap.

"Hello, you must be Dan." The physician came closer to the pair and extended her arm to shake Dan's hand. "He was worried about you."

"I can assure you not nearly as much as I was about him." Dan shook her hand and then watched as she pushed her chair closer to the bed. She was an elderly lady with a kind smile, much like his grandmother's.

"From what we can determine, there is nothing the matter with you. Your labs and scans came back negative and there appears to be no underlying cause for your temporary amnesia. Oh course, I recommend that you follow up with your own physician as soon as possible."

"You mean to say there is no reason why I thought I was another person and felt the need to travel over three hours away from my life?" Phil squeezed Dan's hand tighter as he attempted to process the information. "I feel like I'm losing my mind here. There must be something to explain this?"

"From your history, it appears this might be the result of stress. You had an unusual year per your answers from our questions, with the brain sometimes acting unusual with that amount of stress." The physician reached for her tablet to review the results again. "It is rare; however, you appear to have experienced an episode of dissociative fugue **.** It is typically caused by extreme stress, causes loss of identify, and travel or wandering away from home. The episodes are typically brief and the person regains their identify and memories with no treatment. Since it is caused by stress, the treatment is identifying the cause and reducing the stress."

"But I really thought I was someone else!" Phil felt his breathing increase with his heart rate. "I left everything behind. I left him behind! What does that mean? Will it happen again? What if I decide that I need to rob a bank next time? Or fly to Australia?"

"Phil." Dan rubbed his thumb against Phil's hand to help calm him. "She said reduce stress. We can do that."

"I'm sorry that I do not have more answers for you. As I said, this is rare and it cures itself on its own. That might not sound as great now, but there are far, far worse aliments that could have caused this. Those aliments were ruled out. You are lucky." The physician stood. "I recommend that you go home and find ways to relax. Psychotherapy is always an option as well. You could learn stress reducing techniques and with a little bit of luck, this will never happen again. I wish you all the best. Good day." 

After the door closed behind her, Phil stood quickly and took Dan with him. "I want to go home."

"Phil." Dan said softly to get his attention. Phil stopped near the door, paused with his hand on door. "I, I was so scared. Please, let's take just a moment before we rush out there. Who knows what is waiting for us."

Turning to face his husband, Phil took a few deep breaths and squeezed his hand three times. The physician was right, he had been stressed and working himself up again was doing him no favors.

Once they both had collected themselves, they left hospital to start the journey home.

Sat on the train, Dan threw caution to the wind and laid his head on Phil's shoulder as the train departed to London. Halfway home, Phil realized that Dan had falling asleep. Using Dan's phone, Phil researched dissociative fugue and found it was exactly as it had happened to him. Maybe it was related to his history of sleepwalking? Opening a new browser window, Phil began to research human GPS clips and soon found the market was not there.

 

**Author's Note:**

> "Dissociative fugue, formerly fugue state or psychogenic fugue, is a DSM-5 dissociative disorder.[1] It is a rare psychiatric disorder characterized by reversible amnesia for personal identity, including the memories, personality, and other identifying characteristics of individuality. The state is usually short-lived (ranging from hours to days), but can last months or longer. Dissociative fugue usually involves unplanned travel or wandering, and is sometimes accompanied by the establishment of a new identity.....
> 
> After recovery from fugue, previous memories usually return intact. Because of this, there is not normally any treatment necessary for people who have been in fugue states. Additionally, an episode of fugue is not characterized as attributable to a psychiatric disorder if it can be related to the ingestion of psychotropic substances, to physical trauma, to a general medical condition, or to other psychiatric conditions such as dissociative identity disorder, delirium, or dementia.[2] Fugues are usually precipitated by a stressful episode, and upon recovery there may be amnesia for the original stressor (dissociative amnesia)." (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Fugue_state)


End file.
